Over the past few years I've felt so lost in life and not sure where to go or what to do. Not much has happened to me since I have been home but a lot has changed in me. I can't explain what I am feeling but I am going somewhere. Where? I have no clue but the next chapter of life is going to be very exciting, but I am not writing it! I finally landed an office job that I thought I would never be able to do. I can do it very well now, and you know what? It's boring me. I love my job and the people I work with, but it is boring me. This is not a bad thing. I feel like I have proved once and for all that I can do the clerical work that I have always felt I was denied for. Now I am ready for something more challenging but what is to come? I don't know. I am loving school, and I will have my associates in business not too long from now. I have decided to not follow through on the bachelor in business but swap over to some sort of design program. Why not learn what I truly love??? I want to write, build, design, create something and give it life. The business degree will be very helpful so I am not regretting it, especially because of the writing classes I am currently taking. They are a huge help. I am ready to start the first draft of my thriller/vigilante novel. This one is easier to tackle right now than the epic fantasy story right now. I feel God leading me in a direction. I don't know where, and I don't care as long as he's pulling the reigns. I know this though. I have missed my home very much, but this is not where I am meant to stay. I am very happy here but I belong somewhere else. The time will come for me to move on once and for all. When? I don't know. A lot has changed in me though. I don't fear losing my job because I will always find something else. I really feel I have a new trust in God. It's a big leap for me, especially with financial freedom. I am terrified to take risks with money. I never had anything to fear though, just me being stupid. Well anyway, I am just excited for what's to come. I admit, I had a completely different picture in my head of what it was gonna be like living here at home again. Sadly, it's very depressing. I see failed marriages carrying on like its a funny joke that people just live with because they feel there is no alternative. Well I can't begin to understand that because I have never been married and I do not have children. My choice though, and I have been smart about that. I can't be around people like that though. It's very depressing to see. Life doesn't have to be that way, just have a little faith. Ask him for an answer. You'll be surprised, I promise you that. Now down to business. The synopsis of this novel I have an outline for:
"The Unforgiven"
For Detective Mark Townsend, his job has always been clear: Catch the bad guys, and fight for justice. In a city growing more violent every year, it's harder for Mark to walk the path of the light. Just one year ago, his system failed and allowed a teenage boy to be killed in the middle of a courtroom. Now Mark is beginning to realize the american justice system is failing. He is ready to give up the life of law enforcement once and for all. The day he is about to hand in his badge, a horrific murder is committed. The recent rise in violence has hit a breaking point and now a ruthless vigilante is on the loose. Intrigued by the unique way this killer is committing the crimes, Detective Townsend suits up for one last game. This time though, he faces something more dangerous than ever before: his own conscience, which has him wondering if letting this killer do what he does best, is really a bad thing after all....